Why What We Do Matters More Than What We Say
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “Actions speak louder than words” at least once in your life. Maybe a parent, grandparent, or teacher drilled it into you as a reminder that saying something is easy—but doing something is what truly matters.
I first learned this lesson as a kid when I got caught misbehaving. My grandmother, a gentle but no-nonsense Scottish woman, listened to my hurried apology, then calmly said, “Your actions speak louder than your words, young lady.”
She was right. I wasn’t truly sorry for my behavior—I was just sorry I got caught. That realization stuck with me, and as I got older, I began to see how this principle applies to relationships, too.
Talk Is Cheap—Behavior Tells the Truth
Somewhere between childhood and adulthood, we start giving words too much weight. We listen to sweet promises, comforting reassurances, and well-crafted excuses—even when actions tell a different story.
Have you ever been in a relationship where words felt reassuring but the actions didn’t match up?
💔 “Of course I love you.” But they never make time for you.
💔 “I would never cheat.” But they’re always texting someone else in secret.
💔 “I’ll change.” But they keep repeating the same hurtful behavior.
When someone’s actions repeatedly contradict their words, it’s time to take a step back. Are they showing up for you the way they say they will?
How to Recognize Meaningful Actions in Relationships
If you want to build strong, healthy relationships—whether romantic, platonic, or professional—it’s crucial to focus on what people do, not just what they say. Here are some key things to look for:
✔ Follow-through. Do they keep their promises? Do their words align with their behavior?
✔ Consistency. Do they show up for you regularly, or only when it’s convenient for them?
✔ Respect. Do they treat you with kindness and consideration, even when no one else is watching?
✔ Effort. Do they make time for you, even when life gets busy?
What This Means for You
This doesn’t just apply to other people—it applies to you, too. If you want to build deeper, more meaningful connections, take a moment to reflect:
💡 Are my actions aligning with my words?
💡 Am I showing up for the people I care about, or just assuming they know how I feel?
💡 Do I prioritize the relationships that truly matter, or do I get distracted by empty words?
The bottom line? Love, trust, and respect are built through consistent, meaningful action—not just words.
If you’re ready to create relationships rooted in real connection, I’d love to help. Book a 1:1 coaching session today and learn how to recognize patterns, set boundaries, and build relationships that feel genuinely fulfilling.
You deserve relationships that feel real. Let’s make it happen. 💛