You’re the one holding things together.

And you don’t even know when that became your role.

You:

• Initiate the conversations
• Keep things emotionally steady
• Put in more effort

And it feels like if you didn’t… Everything might fall apart.

Overfunctioning is often mistaken for being:

• Supportive
• Responsible
• Loving

But it’s actually taking on more than your share to manage the relationship. And over time, it creates imbalance.

This usually comes from:

• Not feeling safe letting go
• Believing it’s your job to hold things together
• Fear of what happens if you don’t

So you step in.

Again and again.

Ask yourself:

• What am I doing that hasn’t been asked of me?
• What would happen if I didn’t step in here?
• Am I supporting—or compensating?

Then try doing slightly less.

You don’t have to carry the relationship to keep it.